“Right! Who’s next?”
Christian in heaven: “Me Lord.”
God: “Mmmmm! Let see. I’m checking your file … didn’t you read 2Corinthians 5:11?”
Christian in heaven: “Yes, but I didn’t think it applied to me?”
God: “Let’s see … what Bible have you been reading?”
Christian in heaven: “The New King James Version”
God: “Surely you must know I am the Almighty God (Genesis 17:1); God Almighty (Genesis 43:14); the “I AM THAT I AM” (Exodus 3:14); my name is Jealous (Exodus 34:14); my name is JAH (Psalm 68:4) not that pagan rain god Yahweh called YAH in the New King James. Don’t you know I AM perfection itself, infallibility itself, inspiration itself, I am inerrancy itself?

Is there nothing impossible for me (Jeremiah 32:17)?

Don’t you know I created the universe out of nothing? And I could have done the whole lot in a nano-second if I’d wanted, instead of taking six days? Why would you think that I would not have my written words on earth … me … in the final, perfect, written form … The King James Bible? Do you think I would be so weak and helpless that I couldn’t arrange this?

Christian in heaven: “God, I just thought the New King James would do, in spite of the 59,600 major word changes that altered correct doctrine all over the place … I was sure you wouldn’t have minded? You know … I just thought near enough would be good enough.”

God: “Oh … OK … I see where you’re coming from … Mmmm! powerful argument! … that’s all right then … NOT!

Oh! That means I’ve just wasted everyone’s time and energy, over … what is it … 1600 years … Mmmm! Yes that’s it … in getting you the perfect, preserved, infallible, inerrant and inspired King James Bible … ME IN WRITTEN FORM! THE KING JAMES BIBLE IS ME IN WRITTEN FORM! BOTH PERFECT” Were you so stupid not to connect the dots as follows…

The New King James aka
The Thomas Nelson Bible aka
The Rupert Murdoch Bible aka
The Vatican Bible for Willingly Ignorant Christians aka

The product by the angel of light written for willingly ignorant Christians (2Corinthians 11:14)

Christian in heaven: “Ooops! Gulp! Ouch!”

God: “Furthermore, weren’t you one of those arrogant Christians that despised the Jews, because they didn’t know my name? … as I have written “… but by my name JEHOVAH was I not known to them.” (Exodus 6:3).

Christian in heaven: “Yes, I downgraded you Almighty God, by calling you The Sovereign Ancient Pagan Rain God called YahwehYAH for short (Psalm 68:4 New King James). But this is what the New King James calls you. I now see the NKJV is a poisoned book, and not even to be considered as a version.” (2 Corinthians 11:14) … and you can’t drink water with sewerage in it … mix truth with untruth.

God: “Correct! My words are pure (Ephesian 5:26; Revelation 22:1). Well, by your own standards you shall be judged (1Corinthians 3:15)! Dear Christian let me quote your own ignorance back to you, when you were on earth saying “Wherein have we (Christians) despised your name?” (Malachi 1:6)

Christian in heaven: “Dear God … I am so dreadfully ashamed! Can I repent now?”

God: “Too late!” (1 Corinthians 3:13-15)


Harley Hitchcock  
March 2023


Dear Christian, why would you AND …


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